I Smiled Because
by Gryffindor'sSlytherinPrincess
Summary: I smiled...as I looked down at my Knight in shining armor's face, as I thought about our love and as I stroked my beautiful ring. I smiled...as I thought about my beautiful love, and life...but most of the time I smile because he is smiling too...DMHG


**I Smiled Because**

**Or**

_I Hate Myself for losing him (the original name.)_

_A/N:_** Hey Peoples!! This is an oneshot. If I get enough reviews** _(good ones!)_ **or enough requests then I might make a series-like-thingy out of it. But if I do the ending of this one** _will not change! _

**People this is a Hermione/Draco one shot. Tragedy. Romance. Angst. What is Angst…? Anyways…Please do not flame me and tell me that: a)'Draco and Hermione isn't a "in character" ship, because, well because** _I don't care_**. b)'Hermione and/or Draco are out of character' Really? I hadn't noticed…I mean I only** _wrote the story_**. But what do I know, right? Oh and don't forget about c)… well look at the bottom for c).** _After you read the fanfiction_**. 'C)' will ruin the ficcy that I slaved over for, like, an hour and a half, which is a very long time for me.**

**Toodles. See you at the bottom when you review my ficcy. cookies and roses, and … umm, this goey red thing my mom cooked for dinner to all the people that review. You don't have to take the goey red thing…I just don't want to eat it…. Here it is. **

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Chapter 1. I smiled because. 

"Hermione. Hermione please understand…" His voice was pleading and her face was streaked with tears.

"I…I already tried, Malfoy!" Emphasizing her choice of name with such venom that Draco felt pain strike his cold heart. If his heart weren't already cold as the icy color of his eyes it would have been by now.

FLASHBACK

Draco had to tell her now.

"I'm married!" Hermione's carefully cultivated façade broke and she fell to the ground sobbing uncontrollably. He had been the only one allowed through her barriers and he had been the one to destroy them from the inside out. Starting with her heart.

END FLASHBACK

_We both know that I shouldn't be here, This is wrong_

_And, baby, it's killing me, it's killing you_

_Both of us tryin' to be strong_

_I've got somewhere else to be, Promises to keep_

_And someone else who loves me _

_And trusts me fast asleep_

"Why... How could you do this to me?! How…" She looked at him through her tearing eyes, her face already shiny with tears. Draco felt his heart tighten in pain. _How_ could_ I do this? And to her?_ _Am I that cruel? _

"I can't leave her…She really loves me…"

_I've made up my mind _

_There is no turning back_

_She's been good to me_

_And she deserves more than that_

"You're a filthy hypocrite," Hermione gasped out "what about _me_?! What. About. Me." She shook her head disgustedly.

"Why is that whenever 'she', whoever 'she' is, says she loves you, you go and get married and you're instantly devoted? But when I say it? I being your girlfriend of 6 _years_, you ask me if I'm sure. No. No, Draco I wasn't sure then and I am not sure now. I will _never_ be sure damn it! That's what _love_ is…never being sure whether or not you're right and never knowing what will come next!" She was sobbing again, "Why can't you understand that? Bloody damn Hell. Why don't you _know_ that?!"

"Hermio-"

"No," She spat. Her voice broke. "No, you can't say my name like that anymore. Never again. I won't make the same mistake twice."

_I know that we'll meet again_

_Fate has a place and time_

_So you can get on with your life _

_I've got to be cruel to be kind_

"You don't understand!" He was pleading with her to understand. Pleading. "You can never understand."

_Like Dr. Zhivago _

_All my love I'll be sending_

_And you will never know_

'_Cause there can be no happy ending_

"You're right" Draco's head shot up in shock. "I can never understand. Because I can't and won't ever go through another day like this." Her eyes were, as always, easy to read and were brimming with unsheadable tears. She couldn't let him see how much this hurt her. Both would leave hurt tonight.

_Maybe another time, another day_

_As much as I want to I can't stay_

"Fine," He responded sounding hollow.

_I've made up my mind _

_There's no turning back_

_She's been good to me _

_And she deserves better than that_

_Why does this have to be so hard, or hurt so much? _

"I don't love you," He stated.

"Well, good. Because I don't love you either," She said as she fought to hold in the next round of tears.

"Maybe we-"

"Don't even bother finishing the sentence, Malfoy." He flinched at the use of his surname. "This is the modt painful thing I will ever have to do. And, I want you to know that _I _was the one who stayed by your side even _after_ you got the darkmark. _After _you were found out for what you truly were. A traitor. A traitor to the _Order_. I was so 'devoted' to you that I gave up fighting and took no side during the war. I sat and watched the fight. I watched as two of my best friends were slaughtered and tortured in to insanity.

"After the war, I had two friends. Ginny and you. Now I have no one. Ginny was murdered yesterday by Deatheaters. And tonight I found out you're married. _You_ are the cause of all my bloody problems." He fliched slightly at her venomous accusation.

A muted silence filled the unsaid gaps between them.

_I can't let you see what you mean to me_

'_Cause my hands are tied and my hearts not free_

_We're not meant to be_

"I lied. I do love you." She watched as his body stiffened and his eyes lowered to the stone ground, as cold his heart felt.

She continued to silently to memorize his every facial expression and every feature about him for she knew she would only see him one more time after this. Suddenly her golden-brown eyes locked with his silver-blue ones.

"I'm sorry," He muttered.

"I'm sorry, too."

Eyes still locked with his, she reached her hand out to touch him.

**

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**

--Draco Malfoy; Funeral--

Hermione's P.O.V.

I smiled to myself as I looked down upon my knight in shining amour's cold, still face.

Gracefully I placed my hand onto his and slipped my gold engagement ring onto his middle finger tip, just the way he used to hold it after he slipped it off my hand. It was rose gold, a slight pinkish tint to it, my favorite, with seven stones. One blood red, for our blood that mattered naught. One topaz and one emerald, for my history and his. A glittery amethyst for beauty an opinion of differences. One clear diamond for our love that would last forever and one, aquamarine, for passion. And the center stone a deep blue, 10 karat, heart-shaped diamond for our hopes, dreams, and future as endless as the sea. I remembered it, and that was exactly how he had said it when he gave it to me. It felt like just yesterday…

I smiled, thinking about him, and how he had died…

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"I'm sorry," He muttered. 

"I am sorry, too Draco." Eyes still locked with his I reached out my hand to touch his face one last time. At least, that's what he saw.

Staring mournfully into those deep, endless eyes, I muttered emotionally, and as softly as I could manage without breaking into sobs, six choice words.

_It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do_

_To turn around and walk away…_

_Pretending I don't love you_

"Goodbye, my love. Avada Kedavra!"

**

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**

I smiled because I hate myself for losing him.

I smiled because I didn't have to pretend not to love him.

I smiled because I killed him.

And He knew.

I smiled because when I killed him...

He was smiling, too.

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**A/N:** I really like my ending, but…--sigh-- if you honestly don't like it, review and tell me what was 'wrong' with it. And please, don't say that it was wrong because it was a Hermione/Draco pairing. I might decide to make a sequel to it with the same sort of context but with a different ending. I am also thinking that if enough people like this one I will write a sequel using a different pairing. It won't have the same body or ending but it will be connected to this one in a way…But I can't tell you how, just yet…--mischievous look-- 

By the way if you are having problems picturing the ring as I described it I am going to make a diagram of it for you…'kay? In between the DASHES is the color/name of the stone.

Ruby-Topaz-Emerald-BLUEDIAMOND-Amethyst-ClearDiamond-AquaMarine

Oh! At the top I told you to please not review about A), B), and C). But I didn't tell you C)…C) Please don't review and tell me that I'm a horrible, horrible person, yatta, yatta, yatta because I killed off Draco. I know how you feel. I am totally in love with him, too!!! But I do encourage you to give me some constructive criticism!!

REVIEW!! ...ow! I _mean_ Please review. AND STOP THROWING UGLY PURSES AT ME! Uh...ha. ha.

Much love and fake snow sprinkled in your cornflakes...however if you just click the ickle-little review button you can have special edition fake snow that is made of Gold, Silver and Chocolate!!!!!!!!

Amanda; Catty; Bella; Mandy; Manders; and...--gulp--...sexyboxers...

PS If you can guess why I got the nickname sexyboxers, then you get free chocolate, and I will write any type of non-crossover story of your choice!


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